


Coward

by imastrangeone98



Series: The Past (The Mandalorian) [1]
Category: The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Gen, I make Mando hella mean here and I ain't sorry XD, Unacknowledged pining, degredation, just all in all awful shit, references to slavery, the works, this occurs before canon events
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-22
Updated: 2020-07-25
Packaged: 2021-03-04 22:26:57
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25453879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/imastrangeone98/pseuds/imastrangeone98
Summary: Kyla Baize never talked about her history.The Mandalorian learns why.
Relationships: The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)/Original Female Character(s), The Mandalorian (The Mandalorian TV)/Reader
Series: The Past (The Mandalorian) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1843624
Comments: 10
Kudos: 60





	1. Coward

"You fucked up."

Kyla winced. "I'm sorry, Qin, I didn't mean to-"

Qin snarled, fangs bared. She flinched. "Didn't mean to? You let the bounty escape!"

"There were children-!"

He hissed, "So what?! We lost the money! And because of your carelessness, we even lost the tracking fob!"

In the corner, Ran huffed. "No gettin' that shit back."

Xi'an giggled. "Teach her a lesson, brother."

Said brother growled. "Should I? Do you need to be broken until you finally learn how to obey?" He lifted a hand.

Kyla winced.

"Enough."

The voice cut through the tension like a knife. Xi'an stopped cackling, and Ran straightened his back. Qin hissed once more before slowly lowering his fist. Kyla watched it with a sense of dread.

The Mandalorian had entered.

"New mission," he stated, a new tracking fob in hand. "On Dandoran."

The medic froze. "Who?"

He ignored her. "Old man named Drescant. Thirty thousand credits."

Ran whistled. "More than the last one. That'll get us fuel and shit for days, maybe months."

Xi'an licked her lips. "When do we start?"

"Now."

The group hollered and whooped, eagerly gathering their supplies while the medic stood in the corner, unable to move a muscle.

_Dandoran. **Drescant.**_

_Not again._

"I... I don't think-" she began to say.

"Qin!" the female Twi'lek screeched. "Where did you leave my daggers?!"

"I didn't touch 'em!"

Kyla tried again, "I don't think this job is a good idea..."

Mando, who had been adjusting his blaster, turned his head towards her. His T-visor seemed to stare straight into her soul.

She knew he didn't like what he saw.

"Then stay out of it," he said, his voice icy. " _Coward._ "

She flinched. "Mando, please. You don't understand what-"

"I don't think you understand either." He towered over her; he smelled of blaster gas and some sort of spice.

The ship went silent as the other members began to notice the fight; it only made his voice boom louder.

~~It reminded her of him.~~

"Since the moment we brought you aboard, all you've done was make _everything_ harder. We've lost jobs and credits that _we_ need because of _your_ stupidity."

Kyla hunched in on herself; her hands felt too sweaty. "...That's not fair."

"Fair? You want to talk about fair?" He huffed. "What's fair is that you _leave._ "

She stared down at the floor. "...I can't do that."

"Why not?"

"Yeah," Xi'an sneered, sidling up to Mando and wrapping her arms around his waist. "Why not?"

A drop of sweat slid down her forehead. Her tongue felt too heavy in her mouth. How could she tell them that she was... _that she was..._

"I just..." she choked out, "I _can't._ "

"Then running away shouldn't be too hard for you," Mando spat. "That's what you do best, right?"

Qin cackled, and his sister followed suit. Ran pursed his lips, but said nothing.

"Run. And hide." He pushed past her, and the crew followed him. "You _coward._ "

The hatch closed behind them and their bellowing laughter. Kyla was glad for it; they wouldn't be able to see her tears, or hear her sobs.

They wouldn't be able to laugh at her as she finally broke.

[...]

Locating the mansion was easy. Disabling the alarm systems was easy. Sneaking inside was easy.

So why was Mando so on edge?

Was it the fact that the job came from seemingly out of nowhere? Was it the fact that despite the welcoming lighting, it was completely devoid of life?

...Or was it the fact that the medic's terrified face still lingered in the back of his mind?

He pushed it aside. He meant every word that he said- there was no room for weakness in the world of bounty hunting, and she was full of them. Someone like her needed to stay out of their way, live some ridiculous peaceful life on some ridiculous peaceful planet-

~~Surrounded by beautiful children.~~

"Oh, Mando~" Xi'an crooned by his ear; ~~he fought the urge to flinch.~~ "Why are we waiting? It's empty."

He took another glance. The hallway was clear.

"Go." He sprinted down the corridor, the others at his heels, and peered around the corner towards the office. Also empty.

"Where is everyone?" Ran mumbled beside him. "A summer mansion in the middle of July? Place should be packed..."

"Well, maybe they went to take a swim," Qin replied with a roll of his eyes. "Whatever the case, we should go for it. No one around, no trouble for us."

Mando hummed. "On my mark."

Everyone tensed.

"...Now."

They dashed towards the office. Mando quickly tested the door to find it unlocked. He stepped through, blaster at the ready-

To find no one there.

"What?!" Qin hissed. "But we followed the schedule to a T!"

"Search the perimeter," the Mandalorian barked. He spun on his heel, preparing to exit the room-

And he immediately collapsed to his knees. Air forced itself out of his lungs. His vision began to blacken at the edges.

He felt weak. He felt... _helpless._

"Ah, you finally arrived!" a jolly voice boomed.

Mando barely had the strength to look up. A luxurious purple robe. A long, graying beard. A pudgy face that seemed to radiate nothing but sheer happiness.

Tobblerine Drescant.

"Now, have you brought me my prize?" he asked, eagerly scanning the room while rubbing his hands.

"What... prize?" Ran wheezed. "You're... the goddamn... bounty!"

"Ah, yes," Drescant mused, waving his hand. Immediately, oxygen returned to Mando's body, and he could breathe again. "That silly thing. _I_ had that bounty placed, you know that? I was hoping you'd show up!"

"Well, here we are," Xi'an huffed. "Now release us!"

"Now, now, don't get angry just yet! Besides, not all of you are here. Where is the girl?"

"What girl? What are you talking about?" Qin spat. By the tone of his voice, Mando could tell that he was already itching to tear the old man's throat out.

"Your medic! Kyla! Where is she? Did you not bring her?" He looked distraught. "Oh dear, is she dead? Please tell me she's not dead."

"What? No, she's on the ship. What about her?" Ran asked.

The old man squealed with delight. "So you did bring her! How wonderful! All we need now is for her to arrive. Then we'll have a proper reunion."

_A proper reunion?_

"She quit," Mando groaned. "She probably left the ship by now."

~~She didn't quit. He forced her out.~~

Something didn't feel right. Why was he asking about Baize? How did he know her at all?

"She quit?" He hummed. "What a pity. She's the only reason I contacted you, after all. Well, no matter- I'll just convince her to come."

Mando couldn't take the strange dialogue anymore. "How do you-"

"Know her?" He guffawed, then gave the bounty hunter a smile. "Why, she was my pet! My favorite out of all the others. We _played_ together quite frequently."

Mando froze.

_...Pet?_


	2. Capture

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heavily inspired by BNHA season 3 ep 12. if you watch the anime, you'll know what I mean
> 
> Also I realized I have no idea how the force works- wish me luck on that

Kyla stared at her packed bags and heaved out a sigh. 

_Coward._

She was willing to admit that she wasn't particularly knowledgeable on Mandalorian culture, but she knew enough to assume that it was a strong insult for him.

He was right. She was weak. She was useless. She was a coward.

She started down at her hands. Her wrists felt too tight, like they were still bound in chains.

She would never be free.

" _-la!_ "

She flinched. That voice...

" _Kyla!_ "

High-pitched. Laced with false promises. A voice that reminded her that she would always be less than human.

Shudders ran down her body like shockwaves.

" _Kyla, dear! I have something important to tell you~_ "

She glanced at the ladder. She could run. She could do it. She could fly the ship past the skies of Dandoran and never have to see him again.

A voice boomed, " _Baize! Don't respond! Stay in the ship-_ " It choked out.

Bile rose up in her throat. She knew that voice. The voice that yelled at her in the cargo hold earlier this morning.

_Mando._

She climbed up the ladder to the cockpit and stared, with utter horror, at the round figure of her former master. "No..."

It had happened. Her worst fears had come true. Her nightmares had finally decided to transform themselves into reality.

She was trapped.

" _Hush now, Mandalorian. Now, where was I? Ah, yes..._ " Drescant smiled. " _Your friends are here keeping me company. It would be so lovely if you came to join us! After all..._ " With a snap of his fingers, someone else was forced into he hologram- a broken figure with haphazardly-hanging armor, whose chest heaved with every breath.

Mando. 

Drescant giggled. " _You don't want someone else to die on your behalf, do you?_ "

The transmission fizzed out.

Silence filled the cockpit. Her mind was numb. Her lungs felt like they were being filled with water.

She had lost.

[...]

Drescant whistled a tuneless song as his bodyguards began to line the mercenaries up in a line on the green.

Beside the Mandalorian, Xi'an grumbled, "Can't she hurry it up? My arms are going to fall off."

Mando grunted. He turned to the old man. "Baize isn't that stupid. She won't come for us."

"But you're wrong. She will. She cares about you, doesn't she?" He swooned; Mando shuddered. "Such a sweet thing~ Someone like her needs to be protected-!"

"By you?" Mando spat, not even attempting to hide his disgust. "You filthy, perverted-" Almost immediately, his lungs collapsed, and he wheezed. Blood roared in his ears, and he could barely make out the cries from his teammates.

"Says the one who chose to abandon her," the old fart mused. "Yes, I know all about that little fiasco this morning. I saw it in your head~" He wiggled his fingers with a grin. "How cruel of you. Perhaps you deserve a punishment." He clenched his hand into a fist; Mando fought the urge to scream.

"STOP!"

Air rushed through his lungs. Dark spots danced in his vision. He could hear his own heartbeat.

But he still saw her.

Slowly emerging from the underbrush, clenched hands raised in the air. Her face pale in the light of the sinking sun. Eyes devoid of life.

"Baize!" Qin yelled. "About time you got here!"

"Kyla!" Drescant called, arms spread out wide. "There you are! I've been thinking of you."

"Please..." she croaked, her voice so soft that the wind could only carry it so far. "Let them go. They're not yours to have."

"But _you_ are!" he replied. With a lift of his hand, the mercenaries began to choke. "Tell me, dear, do you really think they can win against me?"

She squeezed her lips shut, but it was no use. Her voice slipped out regardless: "No."

Mando's shoulders slumped. ~~She didn't believe in him.~~

"Then you know what to do, right?" he cooed.

She stared at the ground. "Go back."

His gloved hands tightened into fists.

She looked up. Her eyes were glassy. "And in exchange, let them all go. Let them be free."

Drescant cackled. "That's right! You still remember your lesson! It's so much easier to hurt yourself than let others hurt for you, isn't it?!" He sneered down at the Mandalorian. "Didn't I tell you, hunter? She'll always come back~"

He wanted to scream. He wanted to rip off his cuffs and tear the filthy old man's face to shreds. He wanted to tell Baize to run back to the ship and fly away, never to return. He wanted to tell her so many things-

~~_I was wrong. You are brave. You are strong. I like-_ ~~

But his throat wouldn't cooperate. All he could manage was a single, dry, "No..."

With a snap of his fingers, the mercenaries were hauled to their feet and dragged across the green. Kyla stumbled their way past them towards her former master, who now held a gold collar and chain.

"We're getting off this godforsaken planet," Ran muttered. "I need a drink."

They were in the forest now. The cuffs were removed, and the bodyguards began to step away from them. They all rubbed their wrists and throat.

Mando watched as Drescant latched it around Kyla's neck. He watched as he yanked the chain, leading her back to the house.

"Come on, Mando," Xi'an purred. "Let's go. We can forget all about this~" She linked her arms with his, and tugged him away, hissing at the bodyguards as they went.

He hardly paid attention. He just watched as the medic slowly disappeared from view.

He stared at his hands. Capable, strong-

_Useless._

_Coward,_ he thought to himself bitterly. _You're a goddamn coward._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you're interested in my Tumblr (there's more stuff on there that I'm not gonna post on this site till later): https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imastrangeone98
> 
> moving things on here for archiving purposes XD


	3. Strength

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING: mentions of slavery. implied physical and sexual violence. graphic(?) description of wounds (if you're squeamish of blood)

[The Jungle Planet of Akiva]

The Mandalorian was known for his fearlessness, his ability to relentlessly pursue his enemies, and his jaw ferocity.

As he sat in the corner of the cantina, watching his crewmates get absolutely drunk, he felt neither fearless, nor relentless, nor ferocious. 

He felt...

_He felt..._

He willingly allowed Kyla to return to slavery, to a master who openly abused her, gaslighted her, touched her-

_Touched her._

He had **touched** her.

Unexpected rage coursed through his body, and the cup in his hand cracked.

If he did it before, there was absolutely no doubt that he would do it again... and again... and again.

And he _let it happen._

_...Go back._

The idea hit him so abruptly, it nearly sent his head spinning. He could go back. He could rescue her.

But then what would he do? Of course, there was no way he'd leave her on the planet. But then, what? Would he take her back as a medic? Or would she refuse, demanding he leave her on some remote planet, never to return?

...Or they could hide. Rid themselves of the others and hide out somewhere devoid of life, long enough for the enemies to forget them.

...No, that wouldn't work. From what he could glean, the perverted old man remembered everything. And even if they managed to even escape the mansion, he had that mysterious power to keep them on the property and exact his vengeance.

But what else could he do?

_Mando watched as Drescant latched the collar around Kyla's neck. He watched as he yanked the chain, leading her back to the house._

All he had done was watch. Like a coward. He didn't help her; he was part of the problem.

Which meant he had to fix it.

He stood up, slammed a gratuitous amount of credits on the bar counter, and slipped his way out of the cantina, unbothered to alert his too-drunk crew.

Besides, he had a feeling it'd be better if he did it alone.

[...]

The moment the Razor Crest landed back on Dandoran, he began to feel the familiar twinge in his stomach- the one that reminded him that he could still feel fear. 

As he approached the mansion, the feeling only worsened. As he snuck back inside, it only worsened.

Everything about this situation only seemed to send his senses on overdrive. He _hated_ it. 

He began to hate it more at the distinct sound of _nothing_. There was absolutely nothing. No movement from his bodyguards. Not even a note of Drescant's rambunctious humming.

He decided to prowl the mansion, keeping an eye out for any potential threats. He used every filter he had on his helmet, scanning everything for a possible secret passage, for a trace of a heat signature, for fucking _anything._

He was finally rewarded with a small splotch of red liquid, hidden deep in the back of the mansion. Blood. Recent. There were also specks of dirt, clearly from shoes.

The image flooded his mind in an instant: Drescant's bodyguards dragging a bloody, beaten Kyla down... somewhere.

He followed the faint trail of dirt and worryingly increasing amounts of blood to a section of wall. With a quick scan, he found the switch needed to reveal the hidden passage behind it-

And he wished he hadn't.

The smell of blood was heavy in the air; his helmet could only filter out so much. The stone walls glistened with moisture. And the screaming...

Oh, Maker, the _screaming._

His hands felt clammy. His covered forehead was beaded with sweat. Every never in his body yelled at him to dash down the stairs, beat the living shit out of the old fuck, and haul ass with Baize in tow. 

But he couldn't. Who knows what Drescant would do if he found him out, and Mando wasn't particularly interested in going through another mysterious chokehold.

So he stayed quiet, taking silent steps down each floor, pausing after each one to listen for any signs of pursuit.

By the time he reached the final step, the screaming had stopped. Just in time; his self-restraint was already frayed at the edges. Soft murmuring replaced the screaming, then a shuffling noise- like footsteps.

Mando quickly slid into a hidden crack in the wall, tucking his cape behind him and holding his breath as two pairs of footsteps passed by him.

"-the backtab gel later on," the rotten old man said. "I want her to feel it right now."

"Yes, sir."

The footsteps faded away. Mando waited around ten minutes, in the possibility that they might return. Satisfied that no one was making their way back down the stairs, he slid out of his niche and made his way down the corridor.

And he saw her.

Her back was a bloody slab of meat- torn skin and welts. Her hands were chained above her, and he could tell the cold metal had dug into her wrists to the point of cutting it. Sweat drenched her body, no doubt stinging her cuts. Other than the occasional groan of utter anguish, he would've thought she was dead.

The Mandalorian sobbed.

He may not have inflicted the wounds, but he inflicted the horror. He inflicted the trauma.

"This is my fault..." he choked. Grabbing the keys that were so cruelly placed above her head- so close, yet so out of reach- he unlocked the shackles binding her. "I'm sorry, Kyla. I'm so sorry."

A pained gasp escaped her lips. "No... no more, Master... Please..."

"No more master," he said, tugging off his cape and wrapping it around her. "We're leaving." He picked her up as gently as he could, then carried her out of the room, up the stairs, down the ridiculously long hallway-

"And _where_ do you think you're going?"

_Kriff._

He didn't move a muscle. "I'm going back to my ship. And you're going to let it happen."

"Not on my watch!" Drescant shrilled. "Drop her, and _maybe_ I'll consider letting you go."

A moment passed. Then two. Then three. He could feel the pressure building in his throat.

"Alright," Mando said. "You win. I'm putting her down now." He couldn't see the old man, yet he knew the bastard was smiling.

He kneeled on the ground, carefully setting her down-

And with a flick of his wrist, whistling birds flew out and swarmed Drescant, who began screaming and sending out pulses of that mysterious force to stop them. And- quick as lightning- he grabbed his blaster and fired multiple shots at his chest.

And down he fell. Like a lame animal put out of its misery. 

He gathered Kyla in his arms and carefully approached the body. When it wheezed, Mando sighed. "Stay down."

"Ky..."

"Is with me," he completed. "You don't need to think about her anymore." He sent a blaster shot to his head. "You don't need to think about anything anymore."

He stared at Drescant's corpse. A disappointing end for a pitiful man. Just what he deserved.

Mando adjusted his grip on her, then snuck his way out of the house, careful to avoid the bodyguards, making his way back to the ship.

He chose not to pay attention to the loud alarms as the Razor Crest flew past the mansion. He chose to ignore the useless blaster shots that the bodyguards fired at him as they ascended to the atmosphere, no doubt putting some damage on the Crest's armor plating.

Instead, he chose to focus on inputting the coordinates to Akiva, activating autopilot, and making his way to Kyla's room.

She was still asleep, head awkwardly tilted to the side as she rested on her stomach. He had managed to apply a heavy layer of bacta gel over her wounds, so he did a quick check over the gashes to ensure that there was no infection.

He winced. There was no more blood loss; only time would tell f she had lost too much, but he did all he could in the meantime.

_No... Not everything._

He kneeled beside her, slowly removing his gloves. He brushed a stray lock of hair away from her nose and whispered, "I'm sorry, Kyla. I was wrong."

Her head shifted. Her nose twitched. Bit by bit, her eyes began to open. "...Mando...?"

"Din." He smoothed down her hair. "My name is Din."

"Am... am I...?"

"You're safe. Drescant's gone. He'll never touch you again."

Tears prickled her eyes. "It hurts."

"I know." Din was glad for his helmet; the tears were inevitable." I'm sorry. It's my fault. I let that happen to you." He pressed his forehead against her hand, and fought to stabilize his trembling voice. "I was wrong. About abandoning you back to slavery. About calling you a coward." He squeezed her hand. "You're not a coward. You never were. I see that now. You're the strongest person I know. Stronger than anyone, especially me."

Kyla gazed at him through eyes laden with pain and exhaustion, yet she managed to reach out and brush her fingertips over his helmet. "Strong...?"

"Yes," he confirmed. "You are strong."

She let out a soft sigh, then closed her eyes, returning to a place that he hoped was kinder to her than reality.

As he returned to the cockpit, he allowed himself the time to think.

Strength.

What would it take for him to be strong?

**Author's Note:**

> If you prefer Tumblr, check out https://www.tumblr.com/blog/imastrangeone98
> 
> Another part of my massive Tumblr shift XD


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